Wednesday, March 03, 2010
There is a restlessness inside of me, a stirring. It makes me uncomfortable and hopeful all at once. I feel like my tulip and daffodil shoots, struggling to break through the ground; reaching up to the light, being reborn.
All of the pictures I have been taking have been with my little point and shoot digital camera. It is a Fujifilm FinePix A500. It has been a loyal friend but I am ready for more.
My father was a photographer. He taught me all about lighting and composition and feeling the art of photography. He bought me my first SLR when I was twelve. It was a Minolta XG-M that he picked up at a pawn shop in Portland. I loved that camera and we spent a lot of wonderful time taking pictures. When I was fourteen he brought a Minolta X-700 home for me from the same pawn shop. My first couple years of High School I spent in the dark room. Photography was my passion and I loved the dark room and the magic I worked inside of it. I belonged.
My father died the middle of my junior year and so did my interest in photography. It hurt too damn much. During my senior year I took another photography class and I enjoyed it but the passion was lost, buried like my dad.
Over the years I have taken loads of pictures of my babies. All of them have been with point and shoot cameras. I have basically just been recording events and milestones.
Last fall I participated in a fantastic online writing/photography class from Persisting Stars. I fell in love again with taking pictures. Next week I will be starting the Unravelling course. It is another online photography/writing class. My little digital camera will suffice, but I want more. I want to create, not just document. I pulled out my old Minolta's and they do not work. The XG-M is just dead and my X-700's shutter will not release. It is locked up. I will be sending it out this weekend to be repaired and I am giddy with the thought of actually creating beauty with photography again.
I feel the passion once more.